FATshion Journal Blog by Lilly

It's that time again... Time for my FATSHION post! I strongly believe that no matter your size a day at the hair salon, always manages to make you feel prettier. And today, thanks to the randomness of life I finally got to cut my hair! After over 14 months of delaying a haircut... I finally treated myself to an evening of some self pampering at the hair salon! And as I sat down at the chair, I couldn't help but beat myself up! Ugh! The hair studio I go to (that I haven't been to, in over 2yrs) has floor length mirrors, so you're literally staring at yourself sitting. And you must be wondering... ...Aaaaaand, your point is.... Well, sitting down, I feel, it makes me look wider... Like my thunder thighs (which I do love) look more thunderous! And my double chin, that I normally don't have to look at and be in denial of, was staring at me straight in the face. And I kept on forcing myself to look at the mirror and truly and genuinely like what I w...

I hope everyone had a restful Memorial Day weekend. Mine was jam packed with major accomplishments and lots of love! So much so, that I forgot today was Monday and that I needed to write my blog... And for consistency sake, I am writing to let y'all know to come back June 1st for a Wedding Update...   And that I am thinking about adding some kinda fat girl's guide to feeling and looking good, at least once a month... Every 1st,2nd or 3rd post... I want to try out this challenge I found on Instagram from the Aussie Perth Curvettes! Check 'em out I love theirr Instagram and their blogs! I'm not becoming a fashion/style blog by any stretch of the imagination... BUT I do enjoy looking good and feeling good about myself. And I haven't lately and that is a major part of my anxiety these days. I have been beating myself up and I want to make sure that at least once a month I highlight my many positive attributes! I am also in the middle of planning another trip...

Image from: thefuckitdiet.com Mother's Day was awesome and I ate like a pig after a great day of walking... I am struggling... That ugly wave-length of sadness and anxiety are making their presence known... We are now almost mid-May and I can't seem to get this healthy-kick started... I am tired and I am struggling mentally and physically - I don't have the motivation and really do not care to have it either... Outside forces are making me feel like I need to look differently for the wedding dress... And I am beginning to feel real resentful of their projections because I am willingly making them my own... I am ok with being fat so I don't know why I'm letting other people's opinions of me, affect me... I have been doing a lot of self-hating and avoiding mirrors! And did I mention? I am struggling... I come home from work and would rather clean or watch tv or spend quality time with my loved ones. This past Saturday we went ...

Too many looks to choose from... #FirstWorldProblems Wedding update and post as promised! To all my dedicated readers... I swear my pretentious ass! And thank y'all to those who do read and click on my posts! I made it to 2,500 views - a 1,000 short from my goal but gotta Dream Big as +Victor Ngo would say- so by May 1st let's aim for 4,000 views! Ok... Now to the wedding update: not much news from the last post... I'm still not exercising and we still haven't sent our Save-The-Dates to the printers (Heavy Sigh) But we have been very busy! Big news for all those who have been wanting me to have a baby! And wondering why we finally moved out on our own... We are pregnant! So there won't be any dieting or exercising from this gal! I'm telling y'all I make plans to lose weight and then God says, "nope.. I got other plans for you..." Now, I'm letting y'all know through his forum cause I'm curious to see how many will respond...

Life: Knock Knock Me: Who's there? Life: Mean Spirited... Me: Mean Spirited, Who? Life:  Mean Spirited Insecure Jealous Bitch! And that Bitch that I am referring to, is Me... I have fallen off the wagon- the wagon of self-love! Our venue is officially booked and the next item on the list is our Save the Dates and I am also suppose to officially begin looking for dresses- The "Looking Fly in my size 8/10 jeans" girl I use to be is back inside my head and having an argument with present "Still looking fly in my size 14 jeans" woman. Size 8 /10 convinced size 14 to hold off on sending the Save the Dates... Take a wild guess as to why I haven't??? I feel ugly and I feel ugly because I am fat! Now - WAIT... I know that I have said I am more than ok with being fat and that I do love myself and honestly - I do find myself attractive! (Toot your own horn!) But my self-esteem, recently, is common sense!  (My common sense) I am quick to point out all of ...